This is bizarre, but I really really don't want to go home. It's bizarre because I've spent the past few weeks counting the days until I could call Dad and say "Come pick me up! I'm packed and ready to go!" and then sit back to enjoy a whole month of no school. I've been melancholy and mopey after having to come back here after all those weekend visits in November, and I was hit by a wave of homesickness when I saw my family for the Christmas Concert and couldn't go home with them. I just assumed that the cure for all this would be, well, I dunno, going home, but apparently not, because right now I'm feeling like exactly the opposite may be true. Now that classes are over and I have nothing to worry about, I wish I could just stay here and veg, but I can't. I have to go home and get a job for the holidays and help get the house ready for Christmas.
I am missing my little room quite a bit already, and I haven't even left yet! I'm just trying to clean up a bit and I keep noticing things that I am going to miss so much once I'm back in Bethel Park. I miss the lamp by my bed that I don't have to cross the room to turn off. I miss my pencil cup that always has a fresh pencil in it for my anal little self to enjoy. I miss my beautiful computer that is all mine, with no siblings bugging me to get online so they can play games or shop for who knows what. I miss Pandora, which fills my whole room with music and plays only the stuff that I like. I miss the sink and mirror that are all mine in the morning, with my makeup box and my whole wardrobe close by for optimal primping. I miss my bed with my favorite blanket and those two pillows that make sleep so delightful. This is my space and I am very, very reluctant to give it up. That is, of course, why I am blogging instead of cleaning and packing right now.
Now, that being said, there are some perks to being home.
For example, the shower is about 3 times as large, the food is free here and always available plus I am allowed to make it myself, there are cars here that I am sometimes allowed to drive, etc.
Possibly the greatest thing about being home, though, is the people here. I got to wrap my arms around some people that I love very much for the first time in a loooong time. You really can't beat that feeling. Plus it's hard to miss my dorm when I'm at home; I don't know why.
All said, I'm happy in both places and significantly less lonely here at home, so I guess both places have their perks.
Now, since I'm home and there are lots more people using the computer here and I'm not constantly logged on, it's much more incovenient for me to blog and much more convenient for me to journal. Also I have people to talk to here. So, don't be surprised if my blogs are few until I return to school from Christmas break.
Holiday Blessings to all!!
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