Addicted?

Ok, I'm dying here.  I haven't West Coast Swing-danced for two days now, and Tuesday feels absolutely forever away!!!  How did this happen to me??  Barely two months ago I was just a normal girl, finishing up fall semester and learning how to swing dance.  Now, I'm a full-blown addict.  Check it out:

Criteria for Addiction

* Symptoms have persisted for at least a month or have occurred repeatedly over a longer period of time.

Check.  It's been two months since West Coast entered my life.

* Taking the drug more often or in larger amounts than intended.

Check.  I dance at least twice a week, and I want to dance way more.

* Unsuccessful attempts to quit; persistent desire, craving.

Check.  Never tried to quit (why would I??), but the desires and cravings are indeed persistent.

* Excessive time spent in drug seeking.

Hmm... not sure if this one applies?  I already know when/where to get my fix... so I don't really seek it out anymore.

* Feeling intoxicated at inappropriate times, or feeling withdrawal symptoms from a drug at such times.

Check.  Definitely felt withdrawal symptoms at inappropriate times.  Like in class.

* Giving up other things for it.

Check, check and CHECK!  Like money, for instance.  And time.  Evenings and evenings of time...

* Continued use, despite knowledge of harm to oneself and others.

This clearly does not apply.  What harm could a little dancing do?

* Marked tolerance in which the amount needed to satisfy increases at first before leveling off.

Check!  Two hours of dance is not enough for me anymore.  

* Characteristic withdrawal symptoms for particular drugs.

I'm not sure which withdrawal symptoms are characteristic for West Coast Swing.  

* Taking the drug to relieve or avoid withdrawal.

Does it count that I sometimes try to West Coast BY MYSELF because I want to go dancing so bad?  

Ok, I realize that I'm probably not ACTUALLY addicted to swing dancing, and that this post could be offensive to someone who's actually struggled with addiction.  I was just trying to illustrate my feelings in a clever way.  Don't judge.  Just take me dancing.

Sleeping

One of the disadvantages to having my bed dismantled and in a pile in the corner of my room is that I didn't get it re-mantled in time to sleep on it last night.  This is due to a string of circumstances including meaningful late-night conversations with my roomies, haircuts, long phone calls with strange men, reading Harry Potter book #7, and perhaps more dancing than was absolutely necessary.  Also due to this string of circumstances, I didn't really go to bed until almost 2am, at which time I arranged my pillows in my papasan chair and snuggled in.  It was comfortable at first, but I realized as the night went on that it wasn't quite as nice as I imagined it would be.  I had strange dreams about making out in dressing rooms and losing my sister's dog in New York City.  And when my alarm went off at 8 for my 10am class, my still-half-asleep brain thought that "I slept in a papasan chair last night" was a good enough reason to cut class this morning to sleep more, a thought which was repudiated by my fully-awake self about an hour and a half later.  But what could I do?  By then I had already missed the bus into campus.  My next class isn't until 1.  It seems fitting that I spend this time putting my bed back together to avoid a repeat performance of last night.  Oy.

She Wolf

Overall, I am happier than I have been since the end of September.  I still have ups and downs, but the downs are far less frequent and less painful.  I attribute this turnaround to a variety of things, most important of which are:

-  a wonderful and relaxing Christmas break with my family, who love me no matter how much of a bitch I am and always accept me for me. :)

-  new plans for the future, which I may or may not disclose to you sometime in the next  few months.

-  frequent dancing and plans to dance much more in the coming weeks!

-  participation in my first non-high-school show: The Jungle Book at the Gemini Children's Theater in Homewood, in which I play Mother Wolf and the Monkey Queen.  Loads of fun, good experience for my desired career path, and motivation to do more theater this semester.  (also inspiration for the title of this blog.  though i do always listen to that song while i'm getting ready in the morning. :D)  and I am getting paid!  it just doesn't get any better, does it?

- a newly realistic, humble attitude toward my faith.  we all make mistakes.  i still love God.  but i'm still figuring stuff out, too, and i can't be perfect all the time.  no one can.

Oh, so serious!  But really, I am having a great time.  I love studying music, looking for performance opportunities (and finding them!) and having the self-confidence to be the person I've always wanted to be.  Hopefully I'll be writing more now that I'm not so depressed all the time. :)

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If you have some kids you wanna bring to the Gemini, or you just wanna come see me yourself, the shows are every weekend this month and the first weekend of February.  Tickets are $9.50 each and the shows are Saturdays and Sundays at 1 and 3:30pm for a total of 4 shows/weekend.  I do not recommend coming if you are over the age of 8, since it is most definitely children's theater, but so many people have asked me about it, I thought I would post the info.   That being said, if you are under 8 years old, it is a raucously good time and I highly recommend coming!! 

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